As often as I remind myself that my kids are growing up entirely too fast, and that one day all these things I will miss dearly, I still find myself having a bad attitude about the littlest things, like reading a book for the 1,000th time, giving baths at night, "one more drink of waters" at bedtime, or toys not put away. It is very hard to remain focused on the pure joy of those moments when you are in the middle of them. However, this past week I have thought differently.
Last week when I read about baby Stellan in the hospital and seeing his sweet, baby boy face it just put things in perspective for me. I couldn't imagine what "MckMama" is going through. Yet, just a month ago I found myself in a situation with my daughter, praying over her in the Emergency Room, having MRI's, CT Scans, EEG's, and in an instant you begin to see things differently. In my case, M appears to be a healthy 8 year old little girl who happens to have a form of adolescent epilepsy. Stellan, however, is still struggling in the hospital with heart problems at only 5 months old.
When you think of how short life is, how very precious life is, how very fragile life is....it makes you see things different no matter what they are.
I choose to see things different this week...the good and the bad. I choose to see them as gifts instead of frustrations. I choose the joy in them. I'm reminding myself how dearly I would miss any of these things.
Smudges on the cabinets...I see different.
Snotty noses...I see different.
Wet beds, dirty laundry....I see different.
Bath time splashes that get the whole bathroom wet...I see different.
Reading the same book over and over...I see different.
Bedtime rituals...I see different.
Carpool rushes...I see different.
Homework challenges...I see different.
Five plates, five forks, five cups to clean every night after supper....I see different.
Smiles...I appreciate more
Giggles...I listen harder.
Giant hugs and wet kisses...I savour them.
Snuggles...I treasure them.
Tiny Toes...I gaze longer.
The smell of my baby boys neck....I sniff deeper.
The precious "morning hug" from K...I squeeze tighter.
The flash of a beautiful smile, now adorned with silver from M...I make a mental picture and smile back.