After writing my blog yesterday, I picked up The Best of Proverbs 31 Ministry: Encouragement and Inspiration For Women. and started reading through it. Ironically, I came across this one, written by Suzy Ryan, and it related so well to what I was saying yesterday, and just to my "motherhood" journey in general. It said everything I was feeling and more:
"What will my children recall of their mother? After time sifts through the marathon of life, what memories will champion the winner's circle of their impressionable minds? Will they remember the discipline? I pray they only hear me say, "I love you too much to allow you to choose disobedience."
Will they remember their mom, green-faced, holding her breath, while cleaning vomit off their beds? (or in my particular case, Sofa) I long for them to just savor the warmth of my hug as I gently rocked them back to sleep.
Will they remember looks of exasperation because they wanted to show me the rocks that they found? Surely only my departure from he dishes to discover more treasures will remain important.
Will they remember the countless times I said, "no" to Power Rangers when every other child on the block enjoyed unlimited time gaining "morphin power"? How can they forget about the excitement experienced whiles playing Go Fish, Legos and Play Dough instead?
Will they remember me frantically rushing everyone out the door without using my "indoor voice"? Maybe memory will only acknowledge the fun songs we sang while driving the carpool to church.
How will my three cherubs remember me? Oh please, Lord, as a woman who modeled godliness, so that they will accept and depend on You. I beg You to filter out the many mistakes I made during their development. Allow them to see a glimpse of You love through me.
If they choose to fear and serve You, Jesus, then I am a successful mother."